What do you do when your 9 year old says, with his eyes full of tears, “It’s so hard to be different”. Break my heart. It was the first time he has ever said anything. I was happy he was actually really telling me how he felt, but so heartbroken that he feels like he is the only one who can’t play the violin in music, can’t hold the ruler to make a chart in math and my goodness, he said turning a page in a book is even really fustrating.
I almost feel like I might be crazy. Did I really just believe he truly felt “normal”? Like he could do anything. I know I wanted to believe it and I have never led him to believe any different. But wow, he just sat in front of me and told me he hates being different, it is emberassing to ask for help and nobody understands him.
And who said it was going to be easy right? So being me, I told him the story of a man I once work for. A man who told me I would never be a blip on the radar. A man who fully believed I would not amount to anything. I told Joe how this man had everything it took to have a great company. I told him how it was so hard for me and I had to work every minute I could. I told him some people may only have to work 8 hours a day but to be truly great at something you have to work longer and harder that most.
I ended by saying I believe in you and I believe if you tell me and dad anything and everything you want to do, you will be able to do it. We will help and make it happen. It will be hard work but anything is possible.
I love that boy.
And I am sad to say this took up most of my night, as it should have and I am still working on Photo Love. I almost feel weird saying that cuz it should be the farthest form my mind. But seriously, you guys are huge to me and know that I don;t take it lightly when I have to use my kids as an excuse to not have an obligation done.
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Nothing is more important than the happiness of your child… everything else can and WILL wait.
Kids come first!!!! Especially that sweet Joe!!
Give him a squeeze from the MJC Family, too. We know he CAN do ANYTHING! xoxo to him
I think that you dealt with it perfectly. I once heard someone say that it is those of us who have dealt with difficulties in our lives who truly due amazing things! He has the potential for greatness!
Denise…you were the best thing you could possibly be tonight…mommy. The rest will wait
Please never feel you need to apologize for spending time with your family. It is one of the many things that make me love MJC even more!!
You are a wonderful Mom and great lady…he is a remarkable kiddo!
poor thing..Hugs to that sweet boy of yours.. of course family is first. He is just gorgeous btw
Okay, now I’m crying. I hate that he feels “different”. From your posts, I can tell that he is such a sweet boy and hearing that just breaks my heart
HUGE hugs to him AND to you. As a mom, it is hard to hear things like that from your children. Completely heartbreaking. Please give him a hug from me.
Hugs to you both. Taking care of your kids is never an excuse…no apologies necessary. Love on him, and hold him tight, us big kids will be fine another couple of days!
Ok I do nut know your whole story but… He may not be “normal” but he is the cutest thing since sliced pie. I would take cute over “normal”… besides WHO defines normal anyway???
Sending a virtual hug & much love. You did the right thing. Above all is your family. <3
Denise, we all understand that your company is great because your family comes first! Success happens when your priorities are straight and you, my dear, got it goin’ on! You are a wife and mother first and foremost and that is a huge testimony in its self to the success of MJC! Joe is an amazing little man because of the parents that you and David are!
Oh so tough!!! Had a long talk with my 10 year old tonight about bullying. We even discussed suicide….he brought it up it made me so sad that he knew what that even was….I love when my boys open up and talk to me so unbelievably special!
That boy is more amazing than he realizes and he is going to do amazing things in life. Not to mention, break a lot of hearts! I just adore him!!!! xoxo
Denise you or your children teach me something all the time…………….Maybe that small town feel of coming from Huntington or small town….love that city and even those silly Ft wayne peps………xoxoxoxoo Glenda
Oh, my heart breaks to hear this. And dealing with a heartbroken child is ALWAYS close to home for me. I hope he is able to hold his head high and someday realize how AMAZING he is; how everyone zooms past in life SO FAST and he gets to be the one to slow down and enjoy every single second of every single day; how all of his acomplishments are truely earned and deserved. You are an amazing mom, I have no doubt. It’s times like these that make us snuggle our children a little longer-just to slow time down for a blinking moment.
Beautiful, beautiful boy!! I hope to one day see what great things come from him. Because great things will. What a love.
Thank you sharing this touching story with us. I’m sure he takes to heart what you said and will accomplish great things.
Denise, you should feel great that he felt comfortable opening up to you. I am sure it is hard to be different, I think he will grow to be a stronger person because of it.
Oh my goodness, that’s heart breaking.:(
On a lighter note, he is gorgeous!!
From one mom to another I am proud of you. He made me cry too…kids can be cruel. Lots of hugs to you and your family.
You guys need to snuggle up and watch Ramona and Beezus! My niece lost her great-grandmother today and we just watched it together – made everyone laugh!
I’m so sorry your sweet little man is feeling that way. From someone else who has been “different” somehow….I hope he realizes before I did that the sense of accomplishment gained when overcoming some pretty fierce obstacles is incomparable. You are such an inspiring mama.
Wow…that must have been hard to hear, but how great he has you guys to listen and acknowledge his frustrations. He sounds like an amazing kid for sure!
He really is so darn cute! Those gorgeous eyes and his smile! Keep loving him the way you do and he will be happy! He is normal but has more obstacles to overcome and hills to climb than others. That is why he was blessed with great parents b/c you guys will be there for him every step of the way!
Kids are #1 priority! Joe is a very handsome little boy ! Your a great mom obviously! As my mom use to tell me ” keep your chin up!”
You are blessed to have him and he is blessed to have you. Together you CAN do anything! ((HUGS))
I’m so sorry he’s having trouble feeling “normal”. My 6 year old daughter has arthritis and it’s now in her thumb. This prevents her from holding a pencil correctly – she holds it and writes with a fist. My SIL is constantly correcting her and it drives her nuts. She says “auntie anne, I have ARTHRITIS and I can’t hold my pencil that way!” Your guy will be so strong because of this. Give him a big hug and tell him he’s not alone.
Elsie doesn’t like anyone to know she has arthritis, either.
Aww, Denise… You are so amazing and strong and kind and I just know you will be able to pick that little man up from his down spot and bring that gorgeous smile back to his face.
I know this feeling. We care for my late brother’s little girl. She has severe SPD and ADHD and the road is not always smooth, most often not, actuallyt – but the journey is so priceless and perfect in a way that only she can make it. Toss photo love aside for awhile, pretty please, and go love on that boy.
All the love and hugs in the world to you and yours – hope ’11 finds you all happy and healthy.
xxoo
This is why I love your company! Family truly is first. He will be great, just like his mom!
Denise, My 9 yr old daughter has ADD. She was diagnosed when she was 6. She has worked really hard to keep her grades up and struggles constantly but she has the greatest work ethic I have ever seen. She is now learning to adapt and learn in her own way with what works best for her. She is different and that is just fine with me. I would never ever want her to be normal. I have learnt so much from her. I really truly admire her and she has taught me so much more about life, and what is truly important. Always take the time you need other things can wait…Keep up the good work mom
This breaks my heart! But he has an AWESOME and STRONG mother and father right beside him to show him anything is possible and sometimes being different can make u stand out in a good way. Ill keep you guys in my prayers, a parents biggest broken heart is when there child hurts. big hugs from Tennessee.
I can’t help but know how you are feeling in that situation, with my daughter tatum missing her left arm from her elbow down, even though she has the brightest spirit, and is so excited about life, it just destroys me when she says things like this to me, or when she hates when everyone looks at her and when she can’t hang from the monkey bars at school like the other kids, what can you say to make them feel better? I have found with her when she comes to me because she is down, i find something she is great at that alot of others maybe not so good at. She loves to dance and she does so well, and let me tell you when she gets down i tell her to get out a MJ dress and dance and she twirls it all away, not that joe joe put on a dressand can dance his sadness away but he is an amazing kid and i know there is something he is great at!!! Sorry so long this just really struck a cord. No dream is unreachable unless you let it be
Awwe! I was crying just reading your post! Having 3 internationally adopted children who all look Very different from me, we have had this talk. You are such a wonderful and supportive mom!! May you continue to be Blessed!
Denise… everything you do is for your family. So happy that you will always put your kids first above everything else… that is what makes us all love MJ!
And… I love seeing the blue sky reflected in your gorgeous boy’s eyes… such hope, such promise, such love.
Though he seems troubled with it now, being different is the key to everything and hopefully he sees the benefit of being different some day. As the saying goes, how boring would it be if we were all the same.
But all the same, that age is horrible to be feeling or being different… kids can be so cruel. I wouldn’t go back to that stage in life if you paid me. Best of luck to all of you.
Denise, some of our best friends at church, have a son the age of our boys. He has CP also, and your thoughts and Joe’s, Jimmy and I have heard many times from our friends. I guess since we all had sons the same age, it hit home to us even harder, and it should! When you are a kid, being different is just the hardest thing, any difference is tough. Being a parent is the “hardest”, and the “best” job in the world, and should always come first:)It sounds like to me that Joe is doing the most healthy thing for him and you,and that is to be able to talk to you about this…Joe has an inner spirit that just shines from him all the time, he will do big things one day:)
This post really put things in perspective for me… there I was stressing all day about this contest… and now I realize how silly that was. Thanks for reminding me of what is really important in life. Take care of that darling boy of yours, I’m so sorry he’s feeling sad =(.
You.
Are.
A.
Wonderful.
Mama.
Those “talks” … the raw ones.
Real, and hard, and necessary.
Love you.
Hang in there.
But he is so blessed in another area of his life because he is just so extremely Handsome:)You have to be proud and I am sure you are:)
This is a very sweet and sad story, you are both very lucky to have each other to love! I hope tomorrow is a better day and he believes that he is different because he is special!
You are a great mom!
now i am crying. what a sweet little guy, my heart breaks for him and you.
i don’t know what i am going to do or say the day my daughter says something similar. i can only hope i handle it as well as you.
That just makes my heart ache to hear. You never need to apologize for taking time for your family. You’re a mom, it’s what you do
My heart broke a bit while reading this. I can absolutely understand how hard it is to be the parent of someone who doesn’t fit neatly inside the box. My daughter has a severe, severe peanut allergy and do you know how often kids in kindy are given treats? Seems like almost a daily occurrence. She tries to be brave, but when the whole class is given brownies with peanuts in them, so she has to sit alone while they eat them, she can’t help but tell me how sad she feels. And, it isn’t going to go away, so there is nothing I can do to make it better for her, except tell her that there is a whole world of delicious food out there even if it isn’t what her classmates are bringing in to celebrate their birthdays. It is a very helpless feeling.
He is such a handsome boy! It too breaks my heart when my kids feel sad! I bet that you did a fantastic job making him feel better. We are all different and everyone has their individual struggles. They make us stronger! Hope that you sleep well tonight knowing that you are doing a great job and sounds like you have some really terrific kids!
My sister also has CP. It mostly affects her arms and hands, she has constant tremors. People used to be so mean to her and call her earthquake, I remember many times when she came home from school crying. She has overcome so many obsticles..She is now an Occupational Therapist and helps others. She is such a smart, strong, and inspiring woman. She has never let anything stand in her way! Tell your little guy that he can do anything he sets his mind to and not to let anyone get him down!
You were in the right place… photo love can wait – child love cannot. I am so so so thankful that my Ellie is only 2.5 and doesn’t understand different yet. I think as a parent the only thing I can ever strive for is to raise a child who doesn’t see different and treats all those around her the same way no matter what. I will say I am so blessed to have found a support group for families dealing with the same condition as ours and went to my first meeting last night. It was probably the most comfortable I felt in the last 6 months and it was in a room of strangers. Maybe you guys have a group of support but if not I would highly recommend looking into it. Not only will you be surrounded by parents who understand your struggles, Joe will be around children who understand his struggles. The one good thing is that people who are different are the ones who change the world, so thank God we have them <3
Nothing in this world hurts a momma worse than seeing our children hurting, physically or emotionally. We want more than anything to make it all okay but unfortunately sometimes it is out of our control. Loving and supporting our babies through these situations is what they need most. Being there for them, even when its not easy, is what being a momma is all about. I admire you for keeping your priorities in check. That’s why MJ is totally cool!!
Oh baby girl… This breaks my heart! My little superstar Joe. He is more amazing than any other kid I know! More amazing Not only because he has the most wonderful sensitive, sweet spirit, but because he does work harder! I don’t know if you know this but I have a learning disability, and I worked so hard in school, and never really did as well as the other kids. I spent hours studying, went in during free hours and recess for help and still barely made it through, and darn it girlie…. I’m one of the smartest talented hard working people I know. I know our little man has to work even harder and has a more difficult road ahead than I ever had to face. I just wish he knew how good he will feel about himself and how proud he will be when he is an old person like me. People often tell me that I am so lucky that I am so artistic and creative. I know I am blessed to be given such gifts. I always respond to these compliments by saying… I can’t add, spell, read, or do geometry. What I mean by this is we are all given our own special talents. Our Joe has so many gifts and even though he struggles to keep up with the other kids there are so many things he can do better than them. I know from talking with you that he has an incredible eye and appreciation for beauty, he also has the capacity to feel more deeply and sensitively than any other child I have ever met. Give him a big hug for me. Kiss him and tell him even though it is hard, and ok to be disappointed he struggles, it also makes him beautiful and unique. I love you guys.
God bless you Denise and your family! You think about others 24/7, most of you don’t even know! And u have so much on your plate. Your boy is blessed to have u in his life. Just hearing his story gives light into a dark world…he already is “doing something” BIG without even knowing it.
We don’t care, what’s another day. What you did was put the most important things first today. YAY for you. You are an amazing at so many things, and TODAY, you were amazing at being a MOM. Loves! What a great lesson to learn at his age though, and how awesome that he could open up to you. I hope my kids can do that with me when the time comes.
Since we are all mom’s on here, we all understand the love and support that is necessary for parenting…family first, work later…You are a wonderful mom to a wonderful boy who will remember that story for years to come! Thanks for sharing, it humbles me to see the emotion and love!
You are an awesome mom! Your kids should always come first
I switched jobs once when I had a boss that got mad and yelled at me for putting my son first. I told him that nothing was more important than my son, not this job or anything. My daughter wasn’t born yet, otherwise I would have said kids. Keep putting your kids first 
Denise… thank you for sharing your heart tonight! I excitedly checked for an update on photo love and was challenged and encouraged by your post. First off… I truly believe that those who have to struggle and work hard are the ones that become “World Changers” and they are the ones who have incredible compassion for others. I loved how your life experiences gave you tools to encourage his young heart and I am confident that all of his little life experiences will develop quality character and knit together unique opportunities for him. I love that he comes first… and what a great example you are of love to him and also a beautiful picture how hard work, determination and creativity can make dreams come true…
I am encouraged by your story as well… The freedom that comes from following your passion and owning your own business bring me hope. I literally turned in my resignation yesterday from my “corporate” job to pursue my two passions… First to be a full time momma to my kids and secondly to grow my photography business (Recollect Photography). Your story all the more affirms my decision of seeking my passions in a way that bring value to our family.
Enjoy loving that little one tonight… Guilt free!
Aww! He is so sweet, and I can completely relate as my son is struggling with his transition from pre-school to kindergarten and has moments where he does not think he can measure up to some of the others. Hugs to both of you. What a beautiful and sweet boy you have. Hang in there kiddo, you will get it, and when you do- look out world. xoxo
That br
Denise, you are such a great mum and your son will learn to grow strong.
This time last year our daughter appeared unwell and after visits to the dr’s and some tests we had it confirmed in September that she has Coeliac Disease. It means that she can’t eat anything containing gluten or cooked together with food containing gluten. Although it is something that is easy enough to manage I at first thought “she can’t eat” but now I think “she can have”.
My daughter who is about to turn 6 has adapted really well to it but yesterday she did ask me if I can tell the doctor she no longer want to be gluten free and want to be fixed. She wants to be like everyone else. So together with a friend who’s child has exzema and we talked about the things she could not do. I think it helped my daughter to know that she is not the only one with things she can’t do. There are other boys and girls with different illnesses etc that means they are restricted – although all at different degrees. Regardless, it broke my heart when she said it and once on my own I was close to crying. I don’t want my daughter to feel that way, but what I have to do I have to empower her and let her know it is ok to be different. But it is hard even with a small thing such as Coeliac. I take my hat off to you.
Kids com e first, absolutely. You’re a great mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I loved how you handled that. Thanks for sharing;)
Leslie
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Ashlyn and I have a very similar conversation yesterday. She told me that she doesn’t want to go to school everyday. She said she loves school, but all the working and learning is too hard. AND…for her it is. I can never take that pain away!
How true is it that both Joe and Ashlyn will always have to work harder to be great! But…with our help they can do it.
I sure wish I had your quick wit when it came to responding to Ashlyn. You are such a good mom and handled it very well…made me cry, too!
trying again (my comment won’t post)
From one mommy to another, life should always trump work, you have your priorities right where they need to be. Hang in there
Oh Denise I am so sorry. I can really relate to you. My daughter is almost eight. She is beautiful and bright, however she is so overcome by this sensory processing problem, that it effects her in everyday life. Things that most kids just do and parents take for granted are a struggle for her. Things such as sitting up to a table, (She stands at her desk at school and at lunch, and restaurants.) wearing most ALL clothes and shoes, (Yes sadly most all of her MJ hangs in her closet unworn) Sleeping in a bed, (they have “crumbs” so I call her “Princess and the Pea”) and the list goes on.
However I think dealing with her, and all the therapy and doctor appointments etc, has made me a better mom and I hope a better person. I think it has made her a better person. We do not take things for granted. I hope we have more empathy for others and their struggles.
My daughter has taken it upon herself to help the “special needs” boy during P.E. No one asked her to, she sensed a need and jumped in. Her best friend is deaf. She was the first one to befriend the new girl at school. I can see qualities in my daughter that she might not have developed otherwise.
There are times when it gets hard as she gets frustrated with herself and calls herself “stupid” and wishes she could be “normal”. Who of us is “normal”? Wouldn’t it be a boring world if we were all the same?
It is hard, but I try to look at the positive side of things and count my blessings. Life is better and I get a deeper understanding of what it is really all about. We are all here to learn and grow and in the end, it all comes down to love. Love for Him above, and love for each other.
your little guy is so handsome. His eyes are amazing and say so much! He must be such a blessing in your home!
P.S. How about a MJ photo shoot with some “special needs” kids?
Also any thoughts on some soft and simple MJ clothing that my daughter and others like her could wear?
That picture of your sweet son right here is the exact meaning of ‘Photo Love.’ Your love will get him through it all.
Denise, you are a great mom. Just wanted to share with you about my daughter’s best friend who was born without one hand. She also at 4-years-old realized that she was different and she asked for Christmas from Santa a “hand”. Broke her mommy’s heart. Now she is 6-years-old and doing gymnastics, playing tennis, yes with one hand and as best as she can. That girl does the BEST one-handed cartwheel
. Her parents are encouraging her to do anything she ever wants to and do it the best she can. You keep doing the same too!
So refreshing to hear a mom say she put her child first above her work. Your work is a success because you have your priorities straight;-)
You totally have your priorities in the right place! Like many others have said you are a good Mom! ((HUGS)) to Joe and you! Hang in there you are doing a great job! I have an 8 year old daughter and we have been there, too!
My heart breaks for you. But, you guys will overcome this through the love you have for each other, and through hard work. Sending you many hugs, its not easy to have this type of conversation
That is amazing and what a mother should do…that will be an ever lasting imprint on his heart. You have instilled something great into him. You are truely blessed and so is your family for having such a wondergul mother.<3
Forget Photo Love. We can wait as long as need be! He is a handsome little fella. Bless his heart, made me tear up. Mykids have tons and tons of severe food allergies and my oldest (who is 5) is just now starting to relize how muchshe gets left out, it breaks my heart. She is so mature and understanding about it, so when she does express that her feelings are hurt it makes it that much worse. Much love to you and your little guy!
<3!!
Your children are the most important thing in the world…everything else can just wait.
Praises, praises to that sweet boy for telling you how he feels!! And praises to you for putting your child first!! If we didn’t stop to listen to our children when they really need us too they soon would quit talking to us.
Oh Denise-No worries at all! Your kids come first for sure! Bless his sweet heart! What a courageous little guy he is…and cute as can be too!!! That is awesome he is talking to you…says so much for the mom you have been to him to create that relationship! Press on girl!!!
My 9 year old is just now noticing that he is different (autism). Like you, I don’t know what I was thinking, that maybe he’d never realize? Burying my head in the sand? All we can do is help them be the best they can be, and I remind myself all the time that everyone has something that makes them different. Some more obvious than others, but everyone has a battle to fight.
Your boy is going to go far, he has great parents, he is good looking, smart and hard working – your heart may break for him right now, but the long term prognosis is fantastic. He’s going to be just fine, mama. Keep up the good work. (And c’mon, if anyone cares that you took some time for him instead of working on MJC, they are a big fat meanie head.)
WOW!! I push my kids all the time and tell them they have to wrok hard for what they want and stand out. Be different. Lead the pack. You are a great insperation in me. I can’t image how hard it is for you to look at him in tears and work so hard to make him smile!! I sometime go to my room and cry after holding it together with tough things!!! It is hard, but we must lead by example!! You are the perfect for that. Keep it up!! He has the best mom in the world!!
Denise, I saw Holly’s comment and as her childhood BFF I saw what she went thru daily and can witness all her struggles and hard work. She is a true testament to how hard work and determination you can overcome almost anything. You all are so awesome and God’s beautiful creations! Tell him “You are fearfully and wonderfully made”. Everything God makes is beautiful and perfect. He does not make mistakes and He does not make junk! God bless you and your sweet boys!
Oh, Denise, I cried all the way though your post. My heart goes out to both of you. I felt the same way when I was growing up. Horrible at sports, was “below” average reading,was in many “special” classes, just didn’t feel like I fit in. After many years of that and a little maturing, I realized I didn’t want to be like everybody else. Why be ONE of many who can do something. Even with THOSE kids making fun of me, I did what I knew was best for me. I even dressed the way I wanted. And to this day, I can honestly say I’m better off! I have a great job and a wonderful family life, more than I can say about THOSE people that made fun of me growing up. Joe will find HIS path and make it his own. He has one heck of a Mom and a HUGE support group. Some of the greatest inspirational people of all time, didn’t fit in. Stand out-be noticed! Joe will do great things, I just know it! (Not to mention, I’m pretty sure my dd isn’t the only one drooling over his picture!)
Oh Denise, He is just going through a phase. He will realize that he is a very special boy really soon. Maybe some of his friends were talking about their differences at school and it got to him. I know it is hard for you, but don’t blame anything on yourself. Kids will be kids and this is a time that I am sure that they will all go through around 9 to ten years old. Take a day off or two to do something fun with your little boy. We can wait for the Photo Love details. Its no hurry! He needs your lovin right now. Hugs!
Never apologize for taking the time to make your kids feel special and helping them through things in life. You make complete strangers, women and children (and maybe some dads too
) feel special everyday with your generosity and beautiful clothing! you have a very big heart and I am positive that your boys feel very lucky to have such a great mom!!
Thanks for sharing your family stories, Denise, I think it helps a lot of people by reading your blog. Just continue to be there for him and everything will work itself out for the best. And I love the new web site, excellent job!
Denise,
You are amazing. That was the perfect story to tell him. It is so true how hard work pays off. I hope that his therapy is going well. Being different is hard, but he will be stronger for it in the end. He is an awesome kid and has awesome parents as as example. Keep up the good work. You know that you are a member of the BME club….Best Mom Ever!
Hugs!
Hugs to all of you!
Being different as a child makes you stronger as an adult. He is blessed to have a mother who will take time to listen.
What a beautiful boy! Through God ALL things are possible.
Before becoming a TK, I was a physical therapist
I am always empathetic when I hear stories as this but know that your son was given something special….that is your love and your family! I have worked with many families over the years and can honestly say many parents do not have the skill set to really help children or individuals that may have differences. As a mom, my heart breaks with you but I know as long as he is “a DeMarchis”, he will ultimately be fine. Extra hugs for him from me!
Don’t ever worry about us! We will always wait. Our kids are why we do just about everything we do all day long. You do whatever you need to do, whenever you need to do it. Joe is such a sweet soul, those are the ones who take these things the hardest. You did a great job, sounds like the perfect answer. Hope you both are having a better day today!
You tell that boy that he is my favorite kid to photograph and I adore him!!
Denise – You are AMAZING. Tears in my eyes as I read this. It’s hard being a mom…the sympathy we have for our kids and the desire for them to be happy and success. It sounds like you gave him some great advice. Good work!
Wow…amazing to look at pictures of such a handsome little boy and learn he feels that way…God certainly chose you as his Mom for a reason..he will accomplish anything and everything he wishes to do…childhood can be sooo tough…he’s so lucky to have you..and you are so lucky to have him…kids teach you so much about yourself..about everything:) God Bless you and yours…
I was so truly touched by your words. Not only because you sound like a wonderful mother to those two sweet boys but because you take the time to share it with others. You know, your words can really inspire people. Thank you for letting us into your life through the things you choose to share. And please, work can ALWAYS wait – and certainly we (the collective group of gals who “follow” MJC can (and the photos can wait) too. Thinking and being with your babies (b/c no matter how old they are, they will always be their mama’s babies!), is always most important. Hugs to you all. Tell both the boys that we are ALL different – and that is what makes each one of us special and unique.
Our kids come before anything else in the world. That’s how it should be.
Do not worry about US, you take care of Joe and the Beast, we will still be here, like we always have.
I know it’s hard for my son is not like the others either and he comes home from school crying more times than i care to think about.
XXXX
oh denise! your post really hit home with me. baby ella has some developmental delays and it has been a really tough 6 months. we took her to the developmental pediatrician, and she’s going to be fine, it’s just taking her longer than most to catch up to where she “should” be. hugs to you and your sweet boys!!
As a mom and as a teacher, I feel like my number one job is to help little people find out what they’re great at. I think you said that a therapist once did that for your guy-teaching him how to make shapes that his peers couldn’t because he would be great at that.
Isn’t that what life’s about–finding out what we’re great at. My middle child struggles and has some health concerns while, for my oldest, everything is a breeze. When I’m not in “crisis-mom-mode” to make my middle angel feel better when she’s down, I sometimes think that she’ll be better off in life than my oldest. For my oldest, she won’t be good at everything, and things will get tough at some point–then what??? I sometimes wonder if she’ll have the coping skills… the work ethic, the perseverance that her younger sister has been learning all along–know what I mean…
Good thoughts your way, and here’s to a fabulous weekend!
Girl. Can I just say that you shine brightest when you are talking from your heart, and especially about your kids. Your writing is never better than when you are expressing your true innermost feelings. It inspires and strengthens others. And that is exactly what Joe will do because of his setbacks. He will be an inspiration and have more compassion because he will have learned it from his mama and for himself. Such a gift, really. God knows the rest of us need “differences” in this world to teach us how to love. It’s more for us. Maybe someday he will be able to see it as a gift as well. Love you and Joe in a BIG way!!! You’re doing good, mama! xo
Seriously…that picture of your precious son could not be any cuter! Being a Mom to a 4 year old diva and to my 7 year old little man, there is nothing that hurts worse than having your oldest come to you with those big crocodile tears! You definitely have your priorities straight and don’t ever apologize for that! Our babies are “numero uno”. You seem like a fantabulous Mama!
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I think it’s incredible that he talked to you about his feelings! I really hope my kids continue to know and feel comfortable talking to me about their feelings. You’re an amazing mother. And I hope things get better for him soon. You guys have so many people rooting for you.
xx
Jill
I was just listening to your story and thinking of what I do with my students every day as a music teacher.
I can’t reach them all but finding those “special” talents, be they musical or other, helps kids and all us find happiness.
I tell my students they don’t and probably can’t be great at everything, but when the find their passion they need to embrace it, forget the peer pressure and love what makes them happy!
So talking it out is wonderful and keep up those great conversations!
Denise – I think we all understand and you know, “family comes first”…hugs to you and sweet Joe….your post has struck a chord with me-being in a similar boat with my sweet Miss A…xoxo
As a mom, that crushes me to hear for you. I’m glad he is sharing his feelings, though – you know him best and what you say to encourage him makes all the difference in the world!
Denise, you are SO the best mom EVER!
What an amazing little boy and an amazing Mom!!! Family first – Always!
Hugs to you, sweet mama. Family comes first ALWAYS!!!
Speechless, I have read this over and over. It touches my heart since my 17 yr old nephew has to overcome the exact same issues Joe does. I am his Aunt not his mother and I cry often and pray alot for him and his strength to handle the life he has ahead of him. Lots of love Denise!
Thank you so much for sharing bits of your life with us! Nothing hurts more than when your kids are hurting! I say all the time…that as my boys get older, my hope is that they can always open up to me and know that I will always be there for them! We’re in this together! Tomorrow’s a new day!
Well, I just logged on to see about the company and got so much more than I expected. I live in Detroit, don’t have any idea what a trunk keeper is and just wanted to figure some things out. Instead, I got a truly inspiring story of a mother’s love and I am touched. I am a teacher and the mother of a young daughter and a 13 year-old son with a disability whose school does not want to recognize his disability and literally makes life horrible for him and me. So, as soon as I read your post I immediately empathized with your situation. What I have always tried to do is to hear what my son has to say completely, first. Then, I try to use myself, his dad and other people that he looks up to and their personal struggles as a way to let my son know that he is not alone and that life gets better. I then try to give him words of encouragement and hugs and kisses. Thank you for sharing. Your candor has now made me a new customer and a personal fan.
First – you are so NOT alone in this struggle. Second – You are an amazing mom. And I totally agree with Kayleen.
You are doing exactly what a mom is supposed to do…putting your kids first no matter what. I don’t see how you do all that you do, Denise. Wow! You are like Superwoman or something!!! And when you have a special kid like Joe, you have to make them feel special and in a big way! I work with special kids every day, and they are just that…special…not different or abnormal…each one with his or her own uniqueness and talents…but sometimes they break down just like we do and have those moments where they wish they coulc just be like everybody else. That’s when you have to make them realize that they are special and unique for a reason and that each and every one of us was made different for a reason. I try to help my special kids at school find that one special talent or talents they have been blessed with and build upon that talent each day. Instead of having the other students in their classes making fun of my students for having to come out to the resource room at certain times for “help” instead the other students are begging to come with them to the resource room. They all think that the things we do in my room are “Fun” and “Cool” and they want some “help” too. They are actually envious of my students because they are so special. You are doing so right by Joe with letting him help you with designing MJC…sounds like that’s one of his many talents you can build on. And I would love to have one of the bags he has designed and am sure everyone else out there will love them and want one too. He sounds like a great kid…he is just at that age where he doesn’t want anyone to notice that something he perceives as different from the rest of them. When his bags can be seen, I would love to share his design story with my class. I am sure they would find that so fun and exciting that he is able to design bags that are so popular around the world!!! Do you mind if I share?
I just read this, tears filling my eyes. I too, have the most precious “special” little boy (Connor, age 6)who is so full of life, the light just radiates from his beautiful blue eyes. He too, has a hard time with not being “normal”. He’s so creative; an outside of the box thinker. I love every precious little inch of this tender little person. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. It touched this challenged mom more than you could ever imagine.
I think you are amazing, Denise. The clothes you design are magical. My daughters smile from ear to ear with delight from wearing their MJC! Well, my 6 month old will…soon. My three year old daughter only knows MJC! LOL! Does any other clothing line exist?
Thanks again! I love your blog!